Sometimes you need a change from sticking a penis or a moistened finger into your girlfriend's ear. Here are a few suggestions for other things to insert. NOTE: It is not advisable to stick anything too deep into anybody's ear.
1) The unlit end of a cigar.
2) The bushy tail of a dead grey squirrel from the side of the road.
3) The open end of a tube of toothpaste. (Important note: Only squeeze with your girlfriend's express permission)
4) A badger's nose. If you can get 2 then they make a lovely pair of ear-protectors.
5) A rolled-up slice of streaky bacon. For a special touch, make it smoked.
6) A stick of rock from any of Britain's major seaside resorts.
7) A car compressed into a small, ear-friendly size.
8) A spoonful of popping candy. Add a little water for a fun time.
9) The surviving personal effects of Charles Dickens.
10) A balled-up bunch of grass from the football stadium of your choice.
11) A chewed piece of fillet steak.
12) A piece of paper folded into the shape of an African Elephant.
No comments:
Post a Comment